What in the world is the matter with me? It seems I've been asking myself that question a lot lately. Do you ever get into these "funks," (as I like to call them) when you just feel like you're not yourself, and you're not adding up to what you're supposed to be? It seems like here lately I have been feeling that way more and more. So what is causing this uneasiness? I would like to blame hormones, busyness, lack of sleep...or just anything. But, I know deep down in my heart of hearts what the issue is. I haven't been in His Word...alone...with no distractions, for (I'm so ashamed to admit this) a couple of weeks. Of course we have been to church each Sunday, but in order to be completely filled with Him, I need to be seeking my sweet Savior every hour. Am I still relying on His strength and wisdom and asking for it multiple times a day? Absolutely. But I'm talking about that deep one on one time with the Lord that I need daily. I have neglected that, and believe me, I can feel it.
I have allowed other things to come between my time with the Lord, and I can sense my deep need for Him. I simply need to sit at His feet, allow His goodness and truth to speak to my soul, and be washed in His mercy and grace. How wonderful it is to know that we serve a God who is always waiting for us with open arms. He does not shame us for our mistakes, for He knows we are going to mess up. If God expected us to be perfect, then there would be no purpose for the cross. Jesus took our sin upon Himself on the cross, and paid the debt of our sin in full. We no longer carry the weight and guilt of our sin, for He took it upon His shoulders and defeated it. I don't know about you, but that sure makes me excited! What love He has for us.
So, with all being said, I'm choosing to give up, and go to Him. God tells us in Jeremiah 29:13, "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." I have found it to be true in my life, that when I'm not earnestly seeking Him, my life has no balance. But, when I'm truly seeking Him with my whole heart, He makes things fall into place, and realigns my priorities.
I have been parched and am longing to be quenched by His love and mercy. I'm giving Him my heart and trusting that He will hold me in His arms and renew my strength. Will you go to Him, too? I promise there's no better place in the world to be.